Life Leadership: Your Holiday Survival Kit!

By Laura M. Camacho, PhD

I remember so clearly the first year I felt dread (actually sick at my stomach!), instead of excitement, about the arrival of the holiday season. A time of year that had always been so much fun for me….was now so much work! On top of the Christmas flurry of activities, my middle child, born in December, had become old enough to have certain birthday-party expectations. If I were feeling exhausted already in early December, how would I make it through the 25^th?

I realized then and there I had to take action or else spend the rest of my life dreading the winter holidays. Years later I would work with a coach and refine my system for not just surviving the holidays, but actually enjoying them. This material comes from material I teach in an online “Clarity + Confidence” e-course.

This mini-system is a virtual Holiday Survival Kit (or you might call it a “Holiday Thrival Kit”!)

1. Set an intention.

Intentions are similar to goals but go much deeper. A goal would be buying 25 gifts by December 11, an intention establishes how you want to experience the holidays.

 Examples:

• I wish to experience serenity and joy during the holiday season.
• I wish to deepen relationships with friends and family during this time.
• I wish to creatively celebrate the holidays in a way that refreshes me.

You can write out one statement or several; the idea is to decide in advance how you want to feel during this busy season. One way to think of these intentions is as setting psychic goals. This statement or short list will serve as your guide in deciding which holiday parties to attend, which gifts to buy, how much to decorate, and so forth.

2. Make a budget.

I know this sounds painful, but it’s really trading a short-term inconvenience for longer-term serenity. (Of course you accountants out there may think preparing a budget is great fun!)

How much, really, do you want to spend this month? Are you willing to get into debt (please say “no”!)

Example: You might consider taking Dave Ramsey’s suggestion and paying much of your holiday purchases with cash.

And trust me, your family’s experience of holiday joy is NOT a factor of how much you spend on them. They don’t need to know.

3. Up level your resourcefulness.

This is the natural progression from #2. If you decide to spend less money, you can decide to be more resourceful. Truly, “when there’s a will, there’s a way.”

Example: TJMaxx and Tuesday Morning are glorious places to find great quality, top brands and excellent prices.

You could take this time to pass down a family heirloom. Last year I gave my daughter something from my jewelry box: an emerald and diamond ring for her 16^th birthday (yes, that’s the one born in December!) For boys, an family hunting knife could be a real treasure.

4. Delegate!

Delegating will help you both save money and conserve your energy. Having someone take care of some or a big chunk of your holiday shopping can actually save you a boat load of cash. Someone who is paid to shop for you is not going to spend money on binge shopping, exhaustion shopping or be tempted by items in the check-out line.

Example: Let someone else do the legwork (and the gift wrapping!)

You can also delegate cooking, house cleaning, decorating. It saves you in the long term!

5. Set aside time for yourself.

Unless you carve out time for yourself this month, holiday activities will take over your every moment. Being exhausted or playing the martyr role is not going to make you the life of the party. If you have children in school, it’s probably better to take some time off during the work week. This is an opportune time for PTO, whether you’re employed by someone else or yourself.

Example:

Normally I don’t see clients or schedule meetings for Mondays. During December, I try to keep Friday’s free as well.

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To get your FREE 2-week subscription to Mixonian Magnificent Mindset Vitamins, simply send a blank email to info@mixonian.com with your name on it. You’ll need to send this by December 16.

To some people, the idea of redecorating the living room or remodeling their kitchen gets their creative juices flowing with the thousands of possibilities that the space could take on.  For the rest of us, these types of projects can be overwhelming because of all the choices that exist or because we lack the vision needed to picture the end result.  Perhaps you have a particular style you like but don’t know how to implement the look in a cost-effective or practical way, or maybe you just don’t have the time to spend scouring the stores and internet in search of the perfect pieces to complete the room.  Regardless of your design dilemma, it might make sense to bring in an interior design professional.  A professional can use their vast resources and experience to ensure you explore all of the options (and stay within budget!) so that you end up with a room you love for years to come.  Need help deciding whether to approach an interior designer in the first place?  Read on for some great advice on when to seek the help of a professional.

1. What kind of redecorating projects should someone tackle on their own and which are best left to a professional?

Any type of project that requires interior architecture, built-ins, and other fixed elements are best left to an interior designer.  A good example would be rooms like kitchens and baths that require a lot of design features.  Those rooms require cabinetry, wall coverings, fixtures, and countertops that once chosen are not easily changed like an accent pillow or lamp.  A design professional can help make these kinds of selections so that everything falls into place seamlessly without a less than satisfied outcome.  An interior designer is able to see the individual elements together as a whole; how they will relate and coordinate with other aspects in the room, which is often hard for people to visualize.

Projects that present a difficult design solution are also best left to a professional.  If someone is stuck or confused on how to decorate a space due to strange architectural details, a multipurpose space that needs to be utilized in the most functional way, or there are certain elements already established that are making it difficult to find a solution, an interior designer is a good person to bring in for help.  It’s a challenge, but a fun one, when a designer has multiple variables and goals to accomplish in a design project.  It is our job to take all requests and requirements into account and make them a reality.

2. What information or ideas should people have with them when they first sit down with an interior designer?

Explain what type of project it is, i.e. kitchen or bath renovation, updating a bedroom, or redecorating the first floor of the house.  There are three key points that a potential client should be ready to discuss with an interior designer.

First, explain what activities need to take place in the space, how the space needs to function, and who will use the space once completed.

Second, give an idea of the overall feel and look desired in end.  What type of design style, color scheme, and existing pieces are to be reused in the space?

Third, be thinking of a budget that you are comfortable with.  It can be hard to estimate exactly what a project will cost, but it’s helpful tostart out with a ballpark figure.  Evaluate the amount you would like to spend and be upfront from the beginning.  An interior designer can help determine if the project is feasible due to the budget and if not give ideas and solutions for ways to make it happen.

3. How can someone be sure they are selecting an interior designer that they will work well with and that will carry out their vision? (i.e. what questions should they ask when interviewing)

Do your research.  Ask for referrals.  Once you have a few in mind, check out a designers website, look at their portfolio and type of work, and see if they are listed in any local design magazines.

You want to find a designer that meshes will with your personality.  The interview is not just a time for you to learn about their expertise, but also a time to feel them out and see if they work well with you.

Some questions to ask are:

Is the project doable with the allotted space?

How long will it take to complete the project?

What is the next step after our initial consultation?

4. I have a small decorating budget, should I even consider getting the help of an interior designer?  Is there such thing as too small a project?

Yes, you should consider using an interior designer even if your budget is small.  At Ink Interiors no project is too small or too big.  Many people think that hiring a designer is going to cost more because of design fees, but if you are upfront with a designer from the start, they should be able to accommodate your budget.  Interior Design fees are different among designers, so where one might be to high for a small, price conscious budget, another may be able to do it because of a different fee structure.

An interior designer can help facilitate a small budget because we know where to best source furnishings and fixtures.  Our wealth of knowledge and abundant resources can help guide a client to get the best bang for their buck.

5. How do you tell an interior designer you don’t like what they’ve picked out for you without hurting their feelings?

You just have to be up front.  Interior Designers try really hard to get to know the client and their personal taste.  We want the space to reflect the client when finished, not the interior designer.  There are instances, however, when a client may not like something simply because they don’t, and the designer has no way of really knowing.  If this is the case, speak up.  It’s your space and you should love every part of it.

It’s important to let a designer know if you do not like something, but also important to listen as to why they selected it. It might play a big roll on the overall look of the space.  If it’s something you really don’t like, then it should be replaced, but often times once the designer gives an explanation it might make more sense.

6. If I don’t have a whole room or house to re-do does it make sense to consult an interior designer?  What if I only need a few pieces of furniture spread across several different rooms in the house?

Not all design projects have to include decorating an entire house.  Addressing one room or space at a time is perfectly doable.  If you want a professional opinion and someone with a trained eye, then you should consider consulting an interior designer.  No project is too small or insignificant.

YuDu would like to thank Jesse Phipps of ink Architecture LLC for serving as the resource for this article.  For more information, visit their website or call 843.882.7810.

There is no doubt that caring for aging family members can take an emotional and mental toll on everyone involved. Most people feel more comfortable in their own homes, and when feasible, arranging for in-home care of the elderly is a wonderful option that can help a person feel more in control of their life and circumstances. Regardless of whether you are an out-of-town relative who is looking for full-time in-home help for a loved one or a local family who plan to be extremely involved in the day-to-day care, choosing an in-home eldercare service can be a daunting task.  The following informative tips from the professionals at Home Care Plus can help get you started with this difficult process.

How and why should someone make the difficult choice of using an in-home eldercare service versus caring for their loved ones themselves?

It is not always realistic for someone to take on sole responsibility for caring for an elderly family member. Jobs and other family obligations make it difficult to dedicate as much time as one would like. Families who want to help aging parents live life as fully and safely as possible in the comfort of their own home, but who might not have the knowledge, skills or time to do the job alone can benefit from an eldercare service.  In addition, long distance caregivers who need a local liaison to oversee care and notify them of problems will find these services extremely valuable.

Can people who want to remain actively involved in caring for their loved ones use an in-home eldercare service for certain functions only or on a “part-time” basis?

This is certainly an option.  A good eldercare service provides a solution for everything from personal care and homemaking to companionship and transportation.  The family members involved can determine which services to utilize based on the kind of time and support the family can provide on a routine basis.

Which tasks do you recommend people seek expert help with versus handling themselves?

This is a very personal decision that every family must make.  A registered nurse can provide an individualized plan of care based on the unique needs of the client, a task that may not be possible for someone without training or medical expertise. Caregivers that are experienced and have specialized disease training, terminal and palliative specialized sensitivity training, and enhanced training on health and safety tips (i.e. Fall Prevention, nutrition, safe lifting techniques, etc.) offer a level of care and attention that can help the client maintain a safe and comfortable way of life at home.  That being said, close involvement of friends and family in the care of the elderly makes a world of difference, and the value of offering companionship, helping around the house with chores and meals, or simply providing transportation to appointments cannot be overlooked.

What certifications, qualifications, service offerings, etc should people look for when considering an in-home eldercare service?

It is important to look at how much experience the staff of the eldercare service has in in-home care, as well as the type of training they receive. Ask how long a company has been in business and if the staff is bonded and insured.  Are they available to answer any questions or concerns you have and is there someone on call 24 hours a day should an emergency arise? It is always a good idea to ask for references.

YuDu would like to thank Suzy Kuppens, RN BSN, from Home Care Plus for serving as the resource for this article. Please visit their website or call 843.628.3642 for more information.

Spring is in the air, and the beautiful sunshine and warm temperatures have almost everyone itching to get outside and enjoy Mother Nature.  One of the first places people head is their backyard—for cookouts with friends and family, a game of catch with the kids or with a chair and a good book for some relaxation.  A yard is a gathering place as well as the “first impression” people get of your home, and spring is the perfect time to get it in shape for the rest of the year. Whether you have a green thumb or get the hives when you step into a garden shop, the following pointers from the professionals at AAA Lawncare will inspire you to get out and garden (or bring in a professional to do it for you!).

What are some tips for getting your lawn and landscape ready for Spring?

It’s time to “spring clean” your lawn—pick up all leaves, trim the shrubs, mulch all plant beds, tune your landscape equipment and apply spring pre-emergent before March to help prevent grassy weeds from seeding and coming into the turf grass.  After March, apply fertilizer and weed control to encourage growth as well as to fight any weeds that the pre-emergent didn’t get under control.

What value would a professional bring to the table?

As with most jobs around the house, keeping your lawn looking good is time-consuming. Aside from giving you more free time to focus on projects you might enjoy more, a professional comes on a regular schedule.  Many do-it-yourselfers have trouble finding the time to mow the lawn, much less trim hedges, weed gardens, and weed eat.  Regular maintenance keeps projects manageable and the lawn healthy and looking great. Professionals bring expert and factual knowledge of grasses and shrubs and the ability to foresee things that need to be done when something is going wrong, which can save time and money by catching potential problems early on. Professionals typically guarantee their work, whereas when a homeowner does the work themselves and it is not done right, they have exhausted a lot of time and money for a project not finished or done correctly.

I want to landscape my yard, but I have no idea where to begin!

Drive around your neighborhood and check out lawn and garden magazines to get ideas of the look you want to achieve.  Keep in mind that not all vegetation will thrive in the Lowcountry, and a professional can help you choose plants that are easy to maintain and hardy.  Some great turf options are Centipede, St. Augustine and Bermuda, while Azaleas, Oleanders, Gardenias, and Crepe Myrtles are flowering shrubs that bloom at different times of the year and can be used to create a colorful landscape.  Boxwoods and palmetto trees and shrubs are good choices for lining driveways and walkways.  Most of these plants require minimal maintenance. It is important to manage your expectations with a landscaping project—it takes time for turf grasses and shrubs to grow.  When using a professional, be sure to walk the property and have them map out what they plan to do.  Communication is key to ensuring you get the result you desire!

YuDu would like to thank Joshua Bannister from AAA Lawn Care Specialists LLC for serving as the resource for this article.  For more information, call 843.819.0612 or email Joshua at aaalawnguy@gmail.com.

And let’s not even talk about the food options—I am thinking about throwing a party just so I have an excuse to have Caviar & Bananas cater it and 3.14 Pies supply dessert!  My husband gets much more excited by the idea of dinner at Cypress, Old Village Post House or Taco Boy than by my questionable cooking skills.  Have I mentioned that I am also considering redecorating after my recent visit to Celadon and The Bar Stool Shop?  Hah! All kidding aside, I consider it a privilege to be part of such a strong community of local businesses.  The support we offer each other, and more importantly, the support the community offers us, is truly amazing.

I have thoroughly enjoyed this experience and wanted to give a big shout out to Pam Hartley of Momentum Marketing for the challenge.  So, now that I have all this free time on my hands, who’s next?

I have to confess, I have more clothes, shoes and accessories than I know what to do with.  Before meeting Lee, however, I was often overwhelmed by the choices and didn’t know how to put the various pieces in my wardrobe together.  I found myself wearing the same things over and over again because they are accessible and comfortable, not because they project anything about my personality, style or mood.  Finally, I gave Lee a call.  A style concierge can work with you to help you discover your own personal style and then build your wardrobe around the image you are trying to project.  Best of all, they can do this using your existing wardrobe!

Lee Heyward, founder of Charleston Style Concierge, was kind enough to share her expertise with us.

How does Charleston Style Concierge help women achieve great style?

At Charleston Style Concierge our goal is to help women discover a style they love that makes them feel confident and happy. Ironically style isn’t about fashion—it’s about expressing yourself and feeling comfortable with who you are. We can help a woman do this through our style coaching services.

All of our products and services are education based. We believe that anyone can have great style. All you need are the tips and tricks that are sure to help you look and feel your best. Whether you want to learn how to shop for clothes you truly love or wear what’s in your closet more, we can help!

Will using a service like this save me time?

Absolutely! One of my signature talks is “How to Get Dressed in Ten Minutes or Less.” Women arrive at this talk skeptical that this is even possible, but they leave knowing that it is!

Deciding what to wear can be a very frustrating time waster each morning. The good news is that there is a solution—and it’s easy! The key is creating a versatile wardrobe.

A versatile wardrobe contains clothing and accessories that can be dressed up or dressed down, mixed together differently, and can help you create unique and interesting looks that reflect your personal style.

To create a versatile wardrobe you must be disciplined about what you need. And to know what you need you must know what you have. Spend some time peeking around your closet before you head out to shop. This will help you make smart choices that easily mix with your current wardrobe—keeping you from buying another black shirt.

If I agree to a Closet Edit, will you throw away all of my clothes?

Definitely not! The point of a closet edit is to help you discover the disconnect between the style that you desire and the style you have created. This disconnect is the reason so many women change clothes multiple times before settling on something and running out the door.

A closet edit is an opportunity to take inventory of what you have and what you need—it is your recipe for style. Sure you can whip up a dish without a recipe, but it never turns out quite how you wanted it to. Your style is the same way.

Yes, sometimes it is time for clothes to move on. They can be donated to goodwill, sold at consignment, or turned into other household items. Other times all you might need is a simple alteration to an item of clothing. It can go from something you hate to something you love. Ever had a skirt in your closet that you try on every few weeks and take off because it makes you feel frumpy? You could simply shorten it to the most flattering length for you and voila you have a skirt you actually want to wear.

I don’t have money to buy a whole new wardrobe, but I could use some help “shopping in my own closet.”  Is this a service you offer?

Even if you have unlimited funds, I believe in shopping your closet first. We are human so we easily forget what we have. If you shop your closet first you always know what you have and are able to make smarter shopping choices.

Style can be had on any budget and shopping in your own closet is a great way to do this. Simply having a fresh eye help you create outfits can make your style feel completely refreshed. Worried you’ll go back to putting the same old outfits together? Create a look book. This is a service we offer where we take pictures of outfits we put together for you to reference on a morning you are running late or simply need style inspiration.

I thought only celebrities used personal stylists, isn’t it prohibitively expensive?

Using a personal stylist or style coach is an investment in yourself. I don’t believe there is value in “dressing” a client. I believe in teaching a client how to dress themselves. That might sound funny, but consider where you learned how to dress. Most of us developed a style from things our parents made us wear, what our peers said or did, or by watching others. Working with a style professional is an opportunity to learn what works for your body, your lifestyle, and your desires.

Once you have this knowledge it is easy to say no to a salesperson trying to talk you into a dress you don’t need, decide to skip a trend you know isn’t right for your body type, or know that a simple alteration can save you the time and money it would take to buy a new pair of pants.

About Lee

Lee Heyward is a style coach and owner of Charleston Style Concierge, LLC, a company that specializes in teaching women how to achieve easy and effortless style. Lee works with clients one-on-one, virtually, and hosts monthly seminars. Lee believes anyone can have great style with a little knowledge and an open mind.

For example, a local attorney purchased hours for him and his wife, both very busy professionals. For Mother’s Day, he had a romantic dinner planned, but wanted something extra to give her, so he asked us to put together a gift basket for this new mom. Charleston Naturally had just the stuff! Creams and bath products for new mom skin care, relaxation candles and aromatherapy products are just some of the items we stuffed in that basket. I came out looking like a genius.

Charleston Naturally welcome clients to shop online or at visit their new warehouse on 918 Lansing Drive in Mt. Pleasant.  This weekend they are hosting a “No Click Holiday Event” to benefit Daisy’s Place Retriever Rescue. You’ll see 35%-73% off their entire inventory and if you mention my blog post, you’ll get an additional $10 off a $75 purchase. So go meet these ladies in person and find out first hand how cool their products are. You’ll probably see me there, stocking up on stocking stuffers.

Charleston Naturally

918 Lansing Drive, Mt. Pleasant SC

phone: 877-388-9748 or 843-388-9748

Business Hours: 9am – 5pm EST or 24/7 ONLINE!

Each casserole comes with reheating instructions and the number of servings on the label so there is no guesswork involved, which is perfect for the not-quite-confident-chef I usually turn into when there are no precise instructions to follow. You’ll find no crazy sounding chemicals or preservatives in these foods – just love.

One of the things I really love about this husband and wife team, besides their delicious edamame salad, is how much they give to their community. Mary and Carey support Daisy’s Place (to find homes for aging Retriever dogs), Louie’s Kids (finding childhood obesity), and they sponsor almost every community event I’ve attended. They are true givers.

The Square Onion is also available for lunch on the go. If you stop in the I’On shop, you’ll probably find me tucked away in the corner, usurping Free WiFi, writing my blog and munching on a Mary Hope Salad….

Pam: Sarah, I know you shop for clients in the Charleston area and as the holidays approach, I know your shopping will increase. I challenge you to shop primarily (if not entirely) at locally owned businesses for 30 days for you and your clients.

Me: Done, and?

Pam: And to make it extra fun…BLOG about it. Sarah, you haven’t blogged since July.

Me: gulp. There’s the extra hard part.

Hmmm…Yes, my blogging days are not as frequent as all my social media experts insist they be.   But we are shopping daily for clients and ourselves. In fact, Pam used us last year as her Santa shoppers (click here for her video), buying up all the great toys her son had on his Christmas list.  And we do enjoy supporting area businesses whenever possible (givers gain philosophy, people!). And I’m up to the challenge to write daily…(coffee please!).   So heck yeah, I’m on board!

YuDu Concierge is locally owned and operated and 100% original to Charleston. I absolutely love the entrepreneurial spirit here, and it is attractive to some of the most creative, stylish, delicious, and capable businesses. We are proud to be a part of it all.

Be on the lookout for daily blogs on local places to get what you need. And if you don’t have time to stop by, you know where to find us.

We are pleased to introduce a new series, “When To Delegate”, to help you to determine when to contact an expert for advice and guidance, and we encourage you to check our blog frequently to read about our featured professions.

If you would like to see a specific industry addressed in our new column, we want to hear from you. Please give us a call at 843-972-4008 or contact us at YuDu.com.

Buying a home is not only the largest financial commitment you’re likely to make but also the most labor-intensive and time-consuming process you’ll ever experience.

Here are some questions and answers that can help you decide when it’s time to consult a real estate professional.

HOW DO I EVEN START TO LOOK FOR A NEW PLACE TO LIVE?

How can I get the most for my money? What section of town do I prefer? What are the things I require in my new space? Because there are so many decisions to make and so much information available, the process is best approached through a step-by-step strategy, and a Realtor can help you focus your search. You’ll also benefit because a real estate professional can save you the time and effort of narrowing the hundreds of listings to only those homes that specifically meet your needs and then coordinating the visits to see them.

HOW CAN I DEAL WITH ALL THE PAPERWORK?

Applications and contracts, together with the sheer number of pages involved in the purchase of a home, can indeed be overwhelming. Realtors are trained to explain the terms and language so that you are educated and informed. They take care of the details and prepare the documents for your signature, allowing you to devote your time and energy to the many other arrangements that demand your attention.

I DID IT! THE HOUSE IS MINE! WHAT’S NEXT?

When you relocate, you’ll want to know about the services and facilities in the area. Neighbors, of course, are great sources of information. Realtors, as well, have a vast network of connections throughout the community, and their recommendations of physicians, repair shops and other services can help ensure your smooth move.

YuDu is grateful to Mt. Pleasant-based Realtor Carol Williams for serving as our resource for this article.  Carol specializes in relocation to the Charleston area. For more information, visit her blog at http://techworkingrealestate.wordpress.com or contact her at Keller Williams Realty, 496 Bramson Ct. , Suite 200, Mount Pleasant, SC, 29464. Phone (843) 345-6605.